That Voice

After a few weeks of its opening in theater, I decided to give the movie 50 Shades of Grey a shot and to my surprise, I find the movie different than I first anticipated.  The book has known to be very explicit when it comes to the description of the sex scenes and to be brutally honest, I expected the film to be more of a pornographic work rather than a typical melodrama type.  To my great surprise, I discover a whole different personality in the movie.  Albeit the acting was a bit horrific to my taste, the themes of the movie kept my attention during the two hours running of the movie.  There is something about the protagonist Christian Grey that makes me want to know more about him.  I want to get to know this mysterious man who seems so strong on the outside but have a vulnerable side as well.  From watching the movie by myself, I found my own opinion on the work and discover my own perception of it.  I found my own voice and learning to listen to this voice is a skill we all have to master at some point in life.  This voice will take me far in life when I have to make my own decisions later on--this includes my professional and my personal decisions.  School taught me to think for myself but I think in order for us to know what's truly like to think for ourselves, we have to get out in the real world and actually experience things for ourselves.  In the end, what matters is not other people's opinion, it's your own opinion; you and you alone will be the person who will have to live with the consequences of the decisions you make.  Take advantage of this voice because it will be the light in time of darkness and will help you succeed in any path you choose in life.

How to Use Stress to Your Advantage

Have you ever have one of those days where you just feel like shit? It's one of those days where you wish you did not have to deal with people and you wish your life could be just like your pet, at least your dog or cat only has to eat and sleep rather than dealing with the responsibilities that go with being an adult.  If you have, then you are going through some stressful time right now.  Stress has a negative connotation and most people would do whatever it takes to avoid it.  It's logical right? Many mental illnesses and problems stem from stress and therapists and physicians encourage their patients to seek help when their stress hits at serious level.  As I was talking to my sister today, she stated how she likes to turn negative energy stress to something positive since stress can do some good to us.

Here are a few benefits of stress:

1.  Stress shows you are doing something with your life.
2.  You are bettering yourself when you go through problems.
3.  You are learning how to work under pressure.  This will help us in any future career endeavors.
4.  It adds excitements to our life.

Of course, we should not go out there and seek out opportunities for stress.  People have a tendency to connect stress with the bad feelings in life but we have to remember to use stress to our own advantage.

Letting Go

Growing up we have a tendency to cling to many things in life; this can be the old boyfriend or girlfriend who mistreated us, the friend who kept hurting us over and over, the job that we hate so badly going there every single day.  People say there are times where we have to hold onto something in order for us to grow and for us to learn some discipline; by all means, I see the truth in it and I'm sure most of us have tried it a few times, returning to that old thing or person we used to cherish.
Since that thing has been a part of our lives for so long, we just cannot imagine our lives without it, we can't imagine a day goes by without having it in our daily routine.  It hurts when we have it and it hurts when we don't have it.

Sometimes the best action to take is to let it go completely and move on to the next.  When we move on, we are letting better things to happen to us.  Life can be unexpected but if we learned from our past and have hope that life will get better, that better opportunities will come at the right time, maybe when we least expect.  Also, always remember that the end of something is the beginning of something new.  Life is a cycle and when something goes away, something comes our way.  Lastly, letting things go is a part of growing up and it's a stepping stone to maturity.  We can't have everything we want, but letting go means we are letting new opportunities to enter our path and even renew our spirit.

Why We Need to Make Mistakes

We are fearful to make mistakes in all the things we do in life, from our personal to professional life. We are afraid to get into a relationship and get trip over and fell hard similar to our past failed relationships.  Our bad experiences hinder us from going out and reach our full potential because we never succeed in certain area in life.  Plus, there is a part of us that is afraid of change; being right where we are is too comfortable to make other move.

Being cautious of what is happening can prevent catastrophe and bad outcomes but when we are fearful of our mistakes, this can prevent us from growing and learning.  We learn more when we make mistakes and sometimes we have to intentionally or unintentionally do it in order to learn from our mistakes.  Smart students know it is typical to make mistakes and fall now and then since that is how us humans learn to overcome our fear and actually do something great.  So let your guard down and get out there and do something; you never know, you may land on something great unexpectedly.

The Hardest Part About Being an Adult

The hardest part about being an adult is making your own decisions. Over the years, it seems like a piece of cake as we watch adults making decisions for us at a young age. It didn't seem too much of a hassle or it didn't seem like we don't  have to use our brain but in actuality, we have to use our brain in order to make wise and sound decisions.  We have to be able to compare and weigh different ideas before we reach a conclusion.

There are so many choices to select, and the fact that so many things are happening at once in our lives can cloud and blur our judgements.  Some of the reasons why we have a difficult time making our own decisions is that we are insecure and inconfident about our knowledge and ourselves.  Insecurity results from not knowing what you want out of life and from the mistakes you made in the past. Secondly, we are inexperienced; we may have been raised in a sheltered household and environment so you were not able to reap the benefits from the wisdom of the outside world. In addition anxiety prevents us from thinking clearly and straight as we approach a decision.

Here are a few tips that can help you become more confident as a decision maker:

1. Start small.  Don't go out there and make big decisions such as who you will marry and the right career.  Choose the small things; for instance, decide on what to eat for breakfast, what to do during the weekend, and how to spend your free time.  Small decisions will be stepping stones for your big decisions and big decisions won't seem like a big monster coming to get you.

2. Define your goals. When you have a goal, it will make your decisions ten times much easier to make.

3.  Practice makes perfect.  Like everything in life, the more you practice the more you will get better at it.

On Relationships

For the past eight years, the highlights of my life have been relationships. I am in my 20s so there is no surprise in there as most 20something is searching for friendships and romantic relationships to enrich their lives. During college, it was easy to find people to hang out with since I was around thousands of other students every single day at my university. I was a part of a few organizations and joining different activities was a part of the trend so I was never lonely since I was always around people; in addition, I reconnected with some of my childhood friends and we spent time discovering the fun stuff college students do together (eg. you know the clubbing, the drinking, dating, learning how to flirt, going to dance events for the organizations we were active again, doing community service, volunteering, etc.); I was a shy high school kid so a lot of the things I did in college made up for what was missing before college; plus, I was quite active going to church events and those of you who go to church know churches are experts in getting people together. The opportunities to form relationships were endless and I surely took it for granted.

Now as I enter my late 20s, forming relationships is the hardest thing so far.  First of all, the lack of opportunities is a big hindrance. I work with much older coworkers so it is definitely difficult to connect with them since the age difference separates me and them more than connecting us.  In college, there are clubs to help us find friends and while at work, there is a limit number of people to befriend with.  Secondly, it takes a lot of effort to maintain any relationship; for instance, in college and high school, it was easy plan something to do with your friends since they were always there but as an adult, when the people you are attracted to are gone, it is hard to locate them or even find the time to plan something to do together.

Forming relationships is hard in the adults years but it's possible.  Here are a few keys tips that can help you build a strong relationship.

1. Be intentional.  You have to know what's the reason why you want to be around the person and planned it.

2. Be present at the moment. When you are around another adults, make sure your mind does not wander.

3.  Lower your expectation.  No one is perfect and the higher your standard the less chance you will make friend.

4.  Know yourself and be yourself.  People can smell a fake miles away. Be true self, unleash the mask.  Period.

5.  Have fun! People love anyone who enjoys themselves.

The Other Companion

I have a four month old chihuahua mixed and it's been the joy of my family every since it joined our clan.  My family loves his presence and his excitement every time we goes home from running errands or doing other adult stuff during the week.  Unlike a typical American family, we never got a dog when my siblings and I were growing up as my parents believed getting one would take up too much time and effort to keep it alive; as immigrants, the last thing my parents wanted was another mouth to feed to and to take care of; four little girls took up enough time and energy from my parents already so why add an extra living thing?

I walked my dog this morning and as we scrolled through the tranquil neighborhood, I found myself to be at peace and enjoyed every second of the way with my dog.  I discovered that my dog is like another human being that I can be around with.  The best thing is, I enjoyed his presence even more since we can just be quiet with each other.  I don't know about you but there are times where I prefer being alone with my own thoughts and not have to have anyone talk to me and my dog can do exactly that.  He doesn't talk or try to converse--he's a dog, how can he?-- so he is a perfect friend if you opt to not talk to anyone. I'm not saying you should be a recluse and don't talk or interact with people; I'm proposing that sometimes it's better to be around a living thing that does not talk so you can enjoy the moment and this eventually may bring the unexpected happiness that you can benefit from.  So go ahead and take your canine friend for a walk and enjoy life for what it is together somewhere quiet. You never know you might land on the happiness you crave for all these years.

Crazy in Love...

At the end of the movie trailer for the new adaption The Fifty Shades of Grey, a snippet of the song Crazy In Love, sings by Beyonce, was played during the sex scene between the film protagonists Christian Grey and Ana Steele.  I was drawn to the beat and the seductiveness of the song so I decided to Google the song and Youtubed it; lo and behold, the song was on YouTube like millions of other well-known and top of the chart music pieces; the song is a remixed version of the original Crazy In Love that was first played over a decade ago, in 2003 to be exact, and Jay-Z was the guest rapper, as most of us know Jay-Z is the the current husband of Queen B, aka Beyonce.  I was in high school when the song was first played on the radio and since my English comprehension was limited, the song was indigestible and I find myself to drawn to the beat of music rather than the lyrics itself.

Eleven years later, I find myself to be drawn to older songs and this includes the song Crazy in Love. The lyrics of the song is very simple and easy to fathom but the new remixed version puts it at a different level; it changes the way I view love.  My teen and early 20s self used to believe that in love, one must be there for the other person during the ups and downs of life and I still firmly stick to this belief.  We must accept the other person no matter what stage he or she is in life; we must look pass the flaws and the imperfections since we are not perfect ourselves.  Today, as I am entering my late 20s, I learned that the other important component is being able to be physically attracted to the other person.  The song Crazy In Love reminds me that the physical chemistry between two lovers is just as significant in the equation of love just as other virtues. So what did I learn from this unexpected revelation?  I learned that aging changes how we think about certain things in life, whether we expect it or not, it will come without us giving permission.

Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfQ7ucGQdOM

Who Can Solve Our Problems?

Over years, I learned the hard way how to solve my own problems.  I learned that other people cannot solve my problems and it is best to take things to my own hand rather than being dependent on other people to do it for me.  I learned over the years that the only person who can solve my own problems is myself.  I can gather great advice and tips on how to resolve problems from other people but when it comes to making my own decisions, only I can do that.  Only I can be the person who will be able able to apply what was advised to me and use it to my own advantage since I know my situation best.

The reason why I freaked out to solve my problems is that I was always afraid of making mistakes and taking the wrong turn; I didn't trust myself and know who I was; I didn't know my worth and what I was capable of.  After going out in the real world for three years, it hits me there is no such thing as one right answer, there are more than one right answer to each problem and the only time there is one right answer is when we take tests and the reason is that our teachers, or professors, make up those tests in order to make a grading chart for the class and despite this fact, there are times where there is more than one answer to a test question, which can annoy our instructors and mess up the grading scale.

Only we ourselves can solve our own problems and this applies to our personal and professional life.  When we rely on other people to help us solve our problems, we are taking away the opportunity for us to grow.  When we solve our own problems, we grow and become stronger, tougher, and more assured of ourselves; we grow a thicker skin and this will help us to face other potential predicaments.  The best way to learn this is through personal experiences.  When we experience this, the aha moments will come and we will be more independent in thoughts and as a person.

The Day of Love

Flowers. Red roses. Chocolates. Teddy bears. Romantic dinners. Pretty cards.  Those are the words that pop to our mind when we think of Valentine's day.  We all want that, we all want to feel the love and be loved by someone; that's a part of human nature: we want to share our life with other people and to feel connected.  It is the day where lovers celebrate their affection for each other; for people who are in relationships, it can be a fun occasion, especially for people who just enter a relationship, and for those those who have been a veteran of relationships for a long time (think 4-6 years), the day is just like any other day, there is no difference, nothing special to think about; in fact, they may not even want to celebrate the day.

For the single people, I think this day is a test of character.  The day shows if the single person can be comfortable with himself or herself.  Can they live alone without the desire to have a lover? Can they be by themselves without the grief of not having anyone sending them roses and chocolates? Of course, each person is different on how they deal with this day.  Some single individuals handle being single much better than other people while some individuals feel lonely and even depressed; there's nothing wrong to feel bad since us humans have emotions and it is better that we acknowledge them rather than ignoring them.

I think rather than feeling bad about being single, I think we should do something about it.  First of all, find out why you are single.  Are you too picky? Are you not going out enough to meet people? Are you insecure?  Those are the questions we all should ask ourselves.  Next, we should do something about it.  If you are single because you are always sitting in front of the computer or the television after you get home from work, maybe you should go out and join clubs to meet new people.  Maybe you should join an online dating website to catch more potential mates there.  Maybe you should take this time to work on yourself;  for instance, if you feel insecure of yourself, pick up a hobby to help you find who you are; please note that you must do this for yourself not to please other people.

Whatever situation you are in, take Valentine's Day as a time to learn more about yourself and love yourself: because we all deserve to be loved.

Are You Ready?

As I was having lunch with one of my coworkers, she mentioned how she does not like to date, or even marry, a financially well-off man. When we say a person is financially secured, the term is vague and it can have different meanings base on the experiences and the way of thinking for each person. “Why?” I asked my Asian coworker who was raised in a traditional Vietnamese household; the answer was definitely apparent to me but I wanted her to confirm the reason behind her logic, I wanted to hear her own opinion rather than letting my figment of thoughts interfered. She stated a financially secured man is someone who makes $70,000 or more annually; to me, the $70,000 income line was bit low but to my coworker, it is enough to afford the necessities in life such as a car, a house, and may even support his own future family, etc. Her logic is understandable and it has a lot of merit to it as I have heard and read stories of people’s spouse who left them or filed for a divorce due to the differences in income and life styles between the couple as the years roll on. Sad to say, but that is the fact in life.


The conversation made me think how we sometimes do not reach high enough in life. This applies to our professional and personal life; each of us wants something out of life and we hope to get it but there is always a tick or a thought that holds us back from reaching out. Many people reach for something that what other people consider as beyond our reach while others love to dream and think big. For instance, Oprah once said, “Your life is big. Keep reaching.” In fact, Oprah came from a background of poverty and she is now one of the wealthiest and most powerful women in the world. She wasn’t born rich; she had to work hard to get to where she is in life today, and it was not without sweat and hard-work.


A lot of time, we are our own obstacles. We think we cannot be more than who we are today. We think we cannot do better in life. This can stem from the fear of failures or some other bad experiences in the past; whatever it is, it is holding us back from being successful and being strong. I’m not saying that we should go out in the world and do something extreme or would put us in danger; no of course not, no one in their right mindset should attempt this, rather we have to use our good judgments and trust ourselves rather than letting the reign of fear regulates us.


In order for us to be successful, there are many key points we have to remember. First of all, we have to do something we are passionate about. We have to find our purpose and turn it into the light we will focus on. Why? When things are dark, we will turn to that light; when things go awry, it will show us the way. Our passion will be the light, which no one can take away and it will guide us in any direction we want to go. Secondly, our goal needs to have a systemic approach. We need to come up with steps and strategies and this will help us to deal with whatever comes our way in a more calm way.


Yes, I believe thinking big is possible and we can reach for that big goals no matter where we are in life. The question is: are we ready to put aside our fears and leap into the unknown?


(And yes, I believe every woman deserves to marry a financially secured man, no matter what is her income.)

The Fear of Not Being Fearful

Growing up, we all want to overcome our fears and do great things in the world.  We learn over the years that our fears are not worth our time and we decide to do what we fear the most.  However, have any of you come to a point where as you overcome your fear, you are actually fearful of overcoming it?  You are shaky, sweaty, and scared of what might happen and what would people say as you go through the process of passing our fears.  You lose sleep over what you did and how you would handle the situation even though you know exactly what you should do in order to overcome the fear.  There are many reasons to why you have this fear of overcoming your fear: you are not sure about our future, we are not used to not being fearful, especially for the individuals who have always been scared for most of their lives.  Of all the reasons, the need to please people is the strongest cause of why we are fearful as we confront our fears.  We are afraid of what people have to say to us.  We are afraid of making the wrong move and would lose what we have to people.  The fear of people is what holding us back and preventing us from confronting our fear.

Here are some remedies on what to do in this situation:

1.  We need to reassure our ourselves that we can overcome our fears.  The process of overcoming is a stage process and no one can do it over night.
2.  Remind ourselves that we have to stop being fearful no matter how shaky we are.  We have to keep going and do what needs to be done.
3.  Last and definitely not least, we have to keep our goals in mind.  Our goals should be our drive to overcome our fears.

Our Emotions

"It will make more sense in years to come. Just be an observer, not a reactor, to your emotions.  Most people do not know that it's their emotions that are doing the thinking.  Your emotions are your emotions, but you have got to learn to do your own thinking," said Rich Dad, from the book Rich Dad, Poor Dad.  This reflects a lot of truth about the world around us.  As humans, we have logic on our side if we use it to our advantage; however, if we choose to not use it, we are letting our emotions thinking for us.  We are letting our emotions to direct our life when most of the time, they can lead us to places where we don't want to be or will have regrets later on.  I've been in this pit many times in the past, and looking back letting my emotions doing the thinking was the worst decision ever due to the many angst that follows it.  Letting our brain doing the thinking helps us to avoid situations where we don't want to be in and helps us to make wise choices that are best for us; so what should we do? Be the observer of our emotions rather than acting on it.  When we observe something, we don't let it get to us and irritate us and let it affect our thought process.  We see for what it is and take actions base on what is best for us.  This is something that take will take years for us to come to understand; it might not click right away, but we have to have hope that it will click.

Life: Give Up, Fight it, or Learn from It.

In the book, Rich Dad, Poor Dad, the author Robert Kiyosaki learned from the age of nine that when life pushes him, he can give up, fight it, or learn from it.  Mr. Kiyosaki learned this lesson from his friend Mike's father whom Robert decided to work for 10 cent hourly in order to learn how to become rich.  The wisdom is very useful in a way that we all can benefit from it and put it to good use as we get older and as we navigate life.  From the three options, learning from the pressure in life seems like the best option. But I think otherwise; there are times when the best options are to give up or even fight the battles in order to sort the problems. For instance, if a relationship does not work out, walking away from it may be the best thing in the world for you and your well-being and maybe at time of the happening, you may not realize it, but like Steve Jobs said, "You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards.  So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future." You may not realize it is the best option for you but looking back, you may see that it's the best way to live.  As for fighting it, this might be necessary at times rather than letting things happen to you.  You know yourself so the best advocate for yourself is you; letting other people taking advantage of you will only lead to a negative outcomes at times; so the best way to solve problems is to fight it rather thing letting things happen passively in many occasions.  

Please keep in mind that how you deal with problems depend on each situation.  You cannot give up, fight it, or learn from every problem life toss at you all the time.  You have to use your best judgement and decide on how to deal with situations accordingly.  

Giving Your Brain a Break

Through out my school years, I have had to study numerous topics and had to understand complex subjects that tortured my brain many times--it sounds like  an exaggeration but that's how it felt for many years.  My brain had to work hard in order to memorize and understand the topics; and at times, it felt like I was working harder than many of my high achieving classmates despite how little effort they seem to put into the school work.  I did not understand why some classmates study only one hour while I had to study two to three hours on the same topics and get the same test grades, or worst, getting lower grades than them.  Years after I finished my undergraduate years, I realize that the reason why this is the case is that I did not know how the brain works; I did not understand the quirks of the brain that would have given me an advantage on my study and that would help me to spend less time and get more out of my studying.

I discover recently that the brain loves it when we give it a break.  Why? First of all, the brain is processing the information on the unconscious level, without our permission and notice; it is distinguishing facts and sorting and organizing information in a way so that we can understand it when we come back to study.  Secondly, when we take breaks, we are giving our consciousness a break; when we are studying, I don't know about you but it feels like I am using much more energy than otherwise and everything seems harder when we use only our consciousness.  For instance, I strain and lose my focus easily rather than letting the natural flow of studying takes over.  Breaks allow our consciousness to rejuvenate itself and to renew its fuel so we can reuse it in later time in another study session.

I want to note that this quirk does not only apply to studying for school purposes only; we can apply it in other areas of our life.  For instance, if we run into a problem with a friend or a coworker, we can take a break if we are stuck and are unable to come up with any solution; eventually, a solution will come up when we give it times.  We can use this tip for work- related project or problems as well.  I find that whenever I get stuck on a task at work, taking a break helps me to deal and find the solutions to the problems better later on.

The brain is a complicated organ and researchers are constantly learning new facts about it.  It can handle any learning situation but in order to do this we have to know its quirks and how it works. We now know that the brain loves breaks; so give it tons of breaks, and the paid-off will be obvious in the long run.

The First Time

The first time for everything is the hardest and the most strenuous part of any skill.  It is a process we all have to confront if we want to do something well.  For instance, if you want to have good people skills, you have to get out there and expose yourself to social settings rather than sitting at home and play in front of the computer.  We have to remember that the first time of anything is the hardest and it's the stage we have to go through no matter how embarrassed we are at first and how fidgety we get when we are in it.

There are many things we have to remember in order to get through the-first-time stage of anything:

1.  We need to acknowledge that we will make mistakes and know it is perfectly typical.

2.We need to check our motivation.  Keep in mind of the reason why we are doing this and how important it is to us.

2.  We need to have confidence; be aware that sometimes you don't have the confidence so the best option is to just do it.

One thing I learned over the years is that we do get used to something when we keep doing it.  Time is generally on our side when it comes to learning, when we keep practicing, no matter how much we fall and make mistakes, we will get it, it will click no matter what.  Why? The brain is wired to learn and it will get it.  So go out there and take advantage of any opportunities that will better us as a person.

The Game of Life

"I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it," said Jack Handey.  We all have been there at some point in life; we tried or are trying to see how life works and like Mr. Handey, there are times where life is just confusing and you don't get it.  We want to do well in life and live a satisfied and purposeful life; we want to leave this planet with a positive notes on it and not having any regret.  There are days where life does not make any sense and we wish we can make order out of the chaos that are surrounding us; we get frustrated whenever we run into some sort of unexpected situations and wish they would be solve by themselves.  If there is a magic wand that can make life more beautiful and more bearable, we would jump right to it and put it to good use. However, there is no such thing as this magic wand, so as a result, we have to play this game of life no matter what. We discover that we have to play it well especially if we ran into situations where frustrations are rampant.  In order to win this game of life, we have to play and we have to play smart, no matter what.

Here are a few steps I discovered on how to play this game of life well:

1. Know the rules- In order to know the rules of the game, we have to observe. Observe, observe, observe.

2.Know how things work in life- Know how each part of life works and functions and how they are related. We need to know how people, things, and everything on this earth work and how they fit in the whole picture of what we call life.

3. Set goals- In order to set goals, we have to know what is important in life.  From my own personal experiences and from constant observation, money and relationships are the most important parts of life because they determine our success--or what Americans call success-- and happiness in life.  There has a to be a balance between those two components in life and they are different for each individual.  Knowing what we want out of life will help us decipher what is important and our personal experiences will help us key to what they are.

4. Play smart- We cannot sit passively and expect good things to happen: we have to be proactive.  How?  We have to come up with strategies; like the game of chess (or any board games and sports), knowing the rules of the games is not enough, strategizing will help the players win the game.

Someone once said life is simple but it's not easy.  How hard or easy life is depend on your way of living and how smart you live.  You can decide to be proactive or life will just happen, when you let life to just "happen" you are wasting away years of opportunities that can turn into chances to live a better life.

Problem solving

Problem solving is a skill that must be mastered in order to be success in life; the skill is needed for professional and personal development and in all areas of life.  It's a skill that we need in order to survive life and to reach our goals.  It's easy to say "let's solve the problem" but the difficult part is can we do it under pressure and  under the circumstance where we least expect the problem.  For the past two years, I ran into problems in my personal and professional life and failing to use the systemic approach to the problem results in frustrations and regrets.  The good news is I learned from my past and I am able to think more clearly when problems arise.

Here is a systemic approach on how to handle problems:

Steps 1: Identify the problem.  We have to observe and collect the facts rather than letting our emotions take over.  As humans, we have the tendency to overreact when problems arise; this will not solve anything and we will be unable to see the problems clearly.  Accept and be aware of how you react to problems; it is perfectly typical to be scared and shaky a bit but do not let that feeling clouds your mind.

Step 2: Come up with possible solutions.  There is no one right answer to one problem.  You have to be able to come up with solutions.  Some solutions will work and some will not.

Step 3: Evaluate your actions.  You have to know what works and what does not work.

I was taught to follow these steps in school but it can also apply to real life problems, whether they are personal or professional problems.  The brain is malleable  and you can teach it how to deal with problems.  The faster you apply the problem solving skill the better you will be off in life.

The Wisdom from Little Children

As adults, we have the tendency to hold onto something that should not be held onto.  We held onto the anger, pain, mistakes, grudges, and other negatives that life gives us. Children, on the other hand, have bad days too; they get angry when another kids take their toys away, they get frustrated when their parents refuse to give them the candy they crave, they get irritated when their teacher yells at them.  Children have an innocence that helps them to cope with daily frustrations; this innocence consists of not just pretending nothing happens, but also taking in what happens slightly rather than over thinking it.  As children in the past, we all had this innocence and we lost it as we age; children can handle many setbacks without holding onto them.  Specifically, my nephews are excellent little people who can get over any frustration and move on with life as if nothing happens; I have a ten-year-old and a seven-year-old nephew who bicker numerous times in front of me; they yell, kick, and scream at each other and even at the adults sometimes if they do not get what they want.

As humans, we react whenever something happens; if something bad happens, we get frustrated and if something good happens, we become jubilant and express our feelings by smiling, laughing, getting excited, etc.  But being happy is not always the case in life; we run into problems where we do not expect and they may be beyond our ability to resolve due to our lack of experiences and skills on how to handle it.  The magnitude of the problems children run into is not comparable to adults but we can always learn from how the children respond to the stress and pressure of life.

Here are a few things I learn from watching children go about life:

1. Enjoy every moment. They enjoy their friends' presence and what is in front of them.  They make good use and be creative with what is happening at the moment.

2. They are great learner. They learn by watching; they watch how people respond to things and imitate it.  If they see an adult handling stress in a good approach, then they will imitate that.

3. We can be friends with children.  Teach us how to be open-minded toward different type of age groups; their presence and enthusiasm for life helps us get through the hurdles of life.

4. How to be observant.  Being observant helps us to identify problems and solve them.

5.  How to improvise.  My ten-year-old nephew is a master in this area.  If something happens unexpectedly, he can manipulate the situation and control it rather than letting the situation controls him.

6. How to let go of things.  If children are bothered by something, they easily let go of it and move on to the next.

When life gives us lemon, maybe we should make lemonade and celebrate the sweet things in life and children are perfect creatures who can do this.  People say children should learn from adults, but maybe we should take some time and learn from the children in our house.  Maybe, maybe these little children know something that we don't know on how to deal with life.